Steps to a Great Marriage (#1)

Praise Report: The January MRI showed significant improvement in her spine!

I wrote earlier that I would share some lessons learned about taking one's marriage to the next level. I do believe that they are the foundation for a great marriage. I will share three today. I also decided to "cut to the chase" and not do a lot of illustrating since Deb reserved veto rights on what was written! ha. So here are three of many steps to a great marriage.

1. Let God reign.

A great marriage has God as its foundation, so be God centered, not self-centered. It is His will that must be done, not mine. This life is not about me or mine. It is about God and his work. He will use us as He desires in order to work out His will in this world. Sometimes He does that with untimely deaths and illnesses, and other times He does it with long faithful lives of service. Whichever it is, we must recognize that God is Sovereign, not us. We must be obedient to His commands and teachings and to his direction for our individual lives. We submit and surrender to Him. He is working out history, and we will one day be amazed at how our lives have been impacted by those who came before us and how our lives have impacted people presently and in the future. Trust God - (not yourself, not someone else, nor wealth). This means we even trust Him with our health or lack of it. Instead of asking, “Why me?” we should be asking, “Why not me?” Trials give us an opportunity to grow and bring God glory. This is when we can walk the talk.

2. Live each day as if it is your last.

Life is uncertain. Each one of us who drives or rides in a vehicle could be killed in an accident at any moment. A life threatening disease will open your eyes like nothing else to the transient nature of this life. We have no guarantee of tomorrow much less next month or next year. So tell and show your loved ones how much they mean to you each day. Make each day count with your beloved spouse and children. Do not take your family for granted. Love them dearly. Treat every goodbye kiss as if it were your last goodbye (because one day it will be), and if it should be the last, make sure that you both have pleasant memories of those last moments together. Tell your family those things you want them to know and believe about God and you and tell it to them often. Do for them today what you would like to do for them because you may not a tomorrow with them. (Of course, I am not suggesting running up debts in order to live each day as if it is your last!!! That is irresponsibility and poor stewardship.) But treating them as Christ would treat them is good stewardship of time and resources. Try to live each day in such a way that you have no regrets. Made amends with others and right "wronged relationships". Take advantage of the opportunities God gives you to serve Him; do it today, not tomorrow.

3. Lighten up.

Laugh a lot. See the humor in your situations. Laughter is a good medicine. It relieves stress. It brings joy. Laughter brings happiness. It lightens one’s load. See humor in the circumstances and trials that life throws at us. In May and June as I watched Debbie digress rapidly, I laughed more than I can ever remember. But we were in such a serious fight for health that we needed to lighten up and laugh. So I began to see and enjoy humor in every situation, even most every comic strip. She needed to laugh and laughter is contagious. I am serious minded by nature so I made a special effort to find humor and express it instead of holding it in or shrugging it off. So we shared a lot of laughs.

God bless you all.
dj